So, after 4 or 5 nights at the hospital following hip surgery, dad was transferred to a local rehab facility close to my sister's.

I saw dad there today for the first time since he was transferred, and I have to say, he was pretty cranky and unhappy. He had been in pretty good spirits at the hospital, what with 2 or 3 of his kids there every day.

Why was he cranky? First, someone walked into his room, woke him up and brought him breakfast, but he was supposed to be able to order what he wanted. The bed is not as comfortable.

Then, he was supposed to have 2 physical therapy sessions daily, and he didn't get the morning one.

I inquired about both these things at the nursing station, and for whatever reason, he did miss the morning session but then they did 2 back to back sessions in the afternoon, which he probably didn't realize. The PT people seemed pretty nice.

He complained that everyone seemed to be in a hurry, and that one aide moving him in his wheelchair bumped his leg, which could have been painful though it wasn't.

All relatively minor things, except that, for better or for worse, this is his life for now, and I can totally understand how jarring it must feel to be in a second new environment which is very institutional, and where they have a definite system for doing things.

I reminded him that you can get more flies with honey. I brought the evening paper and read him the headlines, and offered to read whatever stories he might be interested in, but I don't think he had a strong interest. He did have me look up the stock prices of a few companies.

Earlier today I also ordered 3 new audio books for him, which come in the mail. This will also help occupy his time there, so I had to guess at topics he'd be interested in; I picked out a history of Jeff Bezos and Amazon, the history of the NJ Pine Barrens and another audio book about Oak Island, which he's been watching on TV. Unbeknownst to me, my sister also ordered 2 titles for him, too.

I stayed there a little longer than I intended, and when I left, the weather had noticeably deteriorated and it was snowing. I was glad to get home, up my slippery driveway and into my garage with the car for the night.

It will be down to zero overnight and I'll have water dripping from each faucet to help ensure nothing freezes.

The silver lining in my headline has to do with my sister. My dad's injury has forced us to talk to each other, something we've avoided doing for the 3 years since my mother's death. The subject, of course, is how to best meet dad's needs and the myriad little issues that are coming up. After snapping at me for something at the hospital earlier on, her mood has improved, and we are both striving to do what's best for dad. This is exactly the kind of cooperation and joint effort I hoped for when my mom was ill, and it does still make me incredibly sad to think of those times. My sister chose not to be involved. It's ancient history, but various things are happening now with dad that are bringing back memories, mostly not good ones, of how institutionalized care works.

One other silver lining: I actually lost a few pounds during dad's earliest days at the hospital. That first day I saw him there, I stayed 9 hours with him, and didn't eat til I got home that night; the next day, a somewhat shorter stay, but again I skipped lunch. So the weight loss was nice. I'm now just 2 pounds shy of what I weighed 9 years ago.

I spoke to some people at the nursing station on my way out, and I was surprised to meet a nurse familiar with my last name; I didn't recognize her at first, but she was someone I regularly saw for my MS, for years. She was the one who finally prodded me to go one of the so-called disease-modifying drugs and that's when I started Copaxone, in 2000. Anyway, she now works for the hospital and was doing rounds at this rehab facility. While also doubles as a nursing home and is generally a depressing place to be.

I pushed dad in his wheelchair to help him get the lay of the land on his floor, and we explored a lounge area and a dining room before going down the other end of the long hallway; that other end seemed to be reserved for the nursing home patients, and when we both heard 2 elderly people randomly calling out, dad told me to "put it in high gear," meaning, let's get out of here...and we did.

My sister will see him tomorrow afternoon, I'll return Friday, if not tomorrow, and my brother will be there Saturday. I hope he settles into the routine of the place more and experiences no further difficulties with meals and scheduled PT.

I love my dad so much, and it pains me to see him have to stay at this place, and everything else. I hope his stay is relatively short-lived.