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4 days of bliss

November 23rd, 2017 at 01:37 am

I'm looking forward to 4 days of bliss and no work. That's right, 4 days. I learned today that after mentally coming to terms with having to work on Sunday, my manager said I don't have to come in. The others, though, who are working Friday and Saturday, will still have to go in.

I'm trying not to plan too much or add to my to-do list. Probably the thing I most want to get done aside from household chores is get rid of the cut up logs in front where they took the trees down; I'd like to clear away some of the debris while the leaves are off the shrubs, it's not too cold and there's no snow on the ground. Come spring, the brambles could grow back and again make things impenetrable.

I also have a fair amount of cooking to do but I will be spending the big T-Day alone. It still seems dismal but I'm trying not to think about the many Thanksgivings spent with family. All those family dinners over the holidays was just something I took as a given, and I never thought too much about how, one day, being single with no kids and after watching my grandparents die and now my mother, that I would be spending this day alone. I'm sure those of you who are married with children could never imagine anything more depressing, because I can't.

I asked dad last week if he was having dinner at my sister's; I assumed he was but he said she didn't say anything. He doesn't really seem to care that much one way or the other. He's always been like that, which mystifies me. One year he went to my half-brother's for the holiday and he was disappointed because bro's wife, who is Chinese-American, doesn't cook much and they ordered catered food which just wasn't the same.

I thought about volunteering at a homeless shelter or similar type place, but decided I'd rather just stay home than be with people I don't know.

I am going to cook a nice meal for myself, as if I were having company over and put the Macy's Day parade on TV, the way my grandfather always watched it every year. He grew up in the city so I guess it meant more to him, but memories of the TV being turned on to the parade every Thanksgiving are burned into my brain and it feels nostalgic now.

I could have invited myself over to my cousin's in New Jersey, as I learned that she, too, is staying home alone tomorrow. (Her husband died of Parkinson's around the time my mother died 2 years ago.) Last year if you recall I spent Thanksgiving with her and she went all out to make a big traditional dinner for just the 2 of us, and I realized it must've been a ton of work for her when she probably would have rather not done it. She works full-time and never seems to have enough time and what time she has she devotes to multiple cats and dogs in her home. She is always rescuing animals.

I didn't want to burden her with that and to be honest, I didn't feel like doing the drive (1.5 hrs x 2) and most especially, I would feel really bad leaving Luther alone for yet another long day when he spends so much time alone as it is. I could have also invited myself over to my friend R.'s, who goes to his niece's with other family members and makes up a group of 5. (Both he and his sister are divorced, no kids.) His niece has 2 daughters.) I have done major holiday dinners like Easter with them more than once but I don't want to intrude on their own family thing too much and don't want to appear pathetic.

I will make 4 or 5 phone calls to family and friends tomorrow to say hello, but that's about it. I'll browse Black Friday deals on Friday, see Dad on Saturday and maybe catch a movie and get a hair cut at some point.

7 Responses to “4 days of bliss”

  1. ceejay74 Says:

    Happy Thanksgiving! Maybe you'll find you enjoy the solitude. I had one Thanksgiving alone in my early 20s when AS went home and I was too broke to visit my family. It was all right, though not the same. At least there was no pressure at all to get food on the table at a particular time or cook anything except my favorite things. Smile
    I will say, and I have no idea if this is universal, that Thanksgiving is the holiday for me that I absolutely have friends, strangers, whoever come and join. I'm a bit more protective of Xmas as a nuclear holiday -- I'm actually a little bummed that AS's mom changed her plans from coming for Thanksgiving to coming for Xmas, because I selfishly really just like Xmas morning to be for us and the kids. But for Thanksgiving, on the other hand, our downstairs neighbors are bringing their friend that we know and three people we never met, and it's no problem at all.

    Just saying for future Thanksgivings if you find yourself alone, I bet your friend (or other folks) would love to have you join their feast. (I get it about not wanting to make your cousin make a whole meal if she wouldn't otherwise, though.)

  2. Carol Says:

    Happy Thanksgiving! I hope you enjoy your day. I was just remembering days of yore when everyone came to my house, and I would be cooking Wednesday night and I'd be very tired and just trying to get a jump on the next day. I am glad to be just sitting now!

  3. Laura S. Says:

    I spent a few holidays alone when my kids were younger. I was divorced, they were at their father's and I lived far from my extended family. I was also depressed as it loomed, but I came to embrace the solitude. On the bright side, you don't have to drive, can cook exactly what you want and can veg in front of the tv, computer etc. Thinking of you and hope you enjoy the day.

  4. creditcardfree Says:

    Wishing you a wonderful Thanksgiving! I've had Thanksgiving's without my husband. I would still be with my girls and other family, but missing one person changes things. This year is the first year I haven't spent with my parents! Or my oldest daughter. We didn't travel back home. We will be watching the parade too. It does seem to just go with the 'feel' of the holiday. Smile

    Maybe next year you could consider inviting others to join you! Even if an open house style...just stop by for a visit.

  5. Bluebird Says:

    Happy Thanksgiving! I hope you enjoy your day with Luther 😀 you're not alone! Thinking of you!

  6. rob62521 Says:

    I totally understand how you feel. I am married and I am blessed to have my husband. We have lost all family since they have passed on except I have a half brother whom I'd prefer not to deal with. We invited another couple over for dinner today. It kept me busy. I hope you found something that kept you from getting depressed. Thinking of you!

  7. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    It was just my husband and I for Thanksgiving - and like a normal Thursday, he slept most of it. I think I almost prefer it low key like this ...

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