Home > More trials and tribulations

More trials and tribulations

May 25th, 2015 at 06:52 am

One week after starting to clean out the condo, here's what's been accomplished:

I made another two trips over to my mother's today, heading over in the morning. Discovered one entire large cabinet filled with fabrics, scraps and what-not; all of that I threw in trash bags and put in the dumpster at condo. I loaded the car up with a pile of stuff for Good Will, dropped that off, then returned to mom's condo to load up again, then returned to my town and stopped at the library to unload a trunk full of CDs, vinyl records and still more books. Went home and unloaded the rest of the stuff at my house. After 5 p.m., I returned to mom's condo again and loaded up. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Here's where we stand:

Kitchen: While there's still stuff all over the counters, most of the cabinets have now been emptied, and 2 full sets of stoneware dishes, glassware, pots and pans, et, etc have been packed up; there are 4 or so boxes ready for my next trip to GoodWill. Fridge was also emptied. The art on the wall is down.

Dining Room/Living Room: All the books on the 4 narrow and tall bookshelves have been emptied and hauled to library. Two other large cabinets and a large cedar chest have also been emptied. Most of the small stuff has been packed and taken away. What remains are a bunch of small and large pieces of furniture and a dozen or so larger framed art pieces that won't fit in my car. I emailed Habitat for Humanity tonight with pix of the furniture and will await a callback for pickup.

Small linen closet: Partially emptied; I'm using mom's many towels between the framed art pieces so nothing gets scratched. When this is all done, I can donate the towels to the local animal shelter.

Bedroom/office: My mother's office is in her bedroom, and this room is a real mess. The only work done here is the 2 dressers were moved with my handyman to her new place, and some clothing in the closet as well as some books in a smaller bookcase. STill a ton of work here that includes a large metal desk, a small desk, 2 4-drawer metal filing cabinets and her closet. This room will really slow me down. I know it will take time to sort thru the papers, and that's why my initial thought was to take it all home so i could do it at my leisure.

Studio: My mother's studio/loom room is also filled with art supplies and piles and piles of yarns. My sister volunteered to sort through this and thinks she may be able to sell it all in bulk to one or two people, but we had a testy moment because I asked her to give me the proceeds from such a sale because my mother's going to need every penny to keep going at the assisted living place. My sister looked like she was about to say umm, if i'm going to the trouble of disposing of it, i'd like to be reimbursed for it. I actually didn't let her say that. (I should have, but yes, I've known her all my life and she rarely does something without motivation, so I read her mind.) I told her I've already spent hundreds, like buying my mother her new twin bed, and don't plan to reimburse myself for it. That's when my sister said I don't have to play the martyr.

So I don't know where we stand, and it really irks me to think my sister would just pocket the money from the sale. But I'm already in over my head and need the help.

However, my mother's 2 looms, 1 large and 1 small, are worth some real money and I won't let her profit from those. I was researching the brand names and the larger one retails for several thousand dollars new.

The Lower Level: This is more art space and is filled with mostly unframed pieces. My sister also volunteered to work in there.

I know it seems like we (mostly me) got a lot done in 9 days (dare I say 4 weekend days since I worked Monday thru Friday and did not go down there then?), but once i go back to work the progress will slow. I do have 2 extra days off this week and a week off in mid-June, at which time I expect to be interviewing realtors, but I'm also considering using more of my vacation time in June to help ensure this place is on the market by July.

The car: My friend R. said he would help me out by selling my mother's car for me. But then he said he wanted a cut; he first suggested one-third, which seemed like a bit much, but he agreed to one-quarter. So if the car was sold for $1,000, I'd get $750. This money, too, will go back in my mother's account. Of course then I would need to drive the 40 minutes down to his place to drop it off, and I wound up having to post it on Craig's List becus he didn't know how to do it. And I knew his prep school reunion is coming up next weekend so likely no test drives then. It wasn't the ideal situation, but it would relieve me of having to go on test drives with strangers. Especially the kind of strangers who would be interested in a $1,000 car.

But then my sister said her boyfriend would be interested in buying the car for $750. So I'd get the same thing I'd get if my friend R. was selling it, for a lot less hassle as the boyfriend lives much closer and I wouldn't have to wait for a sale. It's possible the car is worth maybe $1200, but honestly, when you put it in reverse it doesn't sound good and sister's boyfriend is planning on replacing the transmission on it.

So hopefully the sale will take place tomorrow. Told my friend R. of all this and thought he'd be relieved, as he kept telling me he was doing me a favor (but wanted some compensation for it) and he actually sounded annoyed. Yet this is the same person who asked me if he could have a particular piece of my mother's art, not for him, but for a friend of his he thought would like it. I let him have it becus I've known R. for 30 years, but it irked me that he assumes it's ok to get something from me for free, yet he finds it necessary to build in profit to sell my car. He also said well gee, you're making $80K a year and I'm working p/t at a gas station making $15 an hour. Well, yes, that's true, but he also chose to give away most of his life savings, several hundred thousand dollars, to his niece. That was his choice. Grr.

11 Responses to “More trials and tribulations”

  1. VS_ozgirl Says:

    I'm guessing it was also his choice to work part time at a gas station too.. Maybe if money was so important to him he could have earned his own in a better paying job. Or not given away his life savings... And the fact that he said "well you're earning $80k a year" and basically said you can afford to give him money? That's really pretty rude.. Some people think about money sooo differently, yet really if they don't value it they shouldn't complain about not having it. I'd take your friend's opinion with a grain of salt, you have enough to sort out right now by the sound of it.

  2. MonkeyMama Says:

    Unfortunately, times like these show people's true colors.

  3. creditcardfree Says:

    R was probably looking forward to the money he would get. It seems you are doing great. I personally, would let your sister deal with the yarn and art supplies. If she sells it and profits consider it the price for having that help. One less thing for you to do.

  4. LivingAlmostLarge Says:

    I would say that you don't need friends like R. Helping a person should be done out of kindness not pay. And you could have traded in the car at Carmax. I would have done that if it's not sold to your sister's boyfriend.

    Yes the yarn I guess let your sister pocket the cash. Again she should be helping out of kindness not pay.

  5. rob62521 Says:

    Your friend sounds like someone who likes to be generous with other folks' stuff. I think selling the car to your sister's boyfriend sounds like a better in hand, he knows it isn't perfect, and you move on.

  6. Joe Says:

    Any chance you could post some pictures of your mother's artwork?

  7. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    Are you going to need to keep any of the furniture/artwork in the condo for when you're trying to sell it? Staging I think it's called.

  8. My English Castle Says:

    Yikes. What a trying time for you. Sounds like everyone's nerves are fraying.
    Wishing you smoother days.

  9. PatientSaver Says:

    Yes, frugaltexan, i am keeping select pieces of furniture in the condo for staging purposes, and also becus right now, it would be a hassle to move. So the brown leather couch will stay, as well as the queen bed, and a select number of larger sized framed art, the ones i don't care too much about but they do serve a purpose as far s staging.

    I'll post some of mom's art in next post, Joe...thanks for asking!

  10. CB in the City Says:

    Tired just reading about all this. I'm guessing your sister wouldn't help if she didn't get something out of it, so I guess you just have to gauge how much the help is worth to you. I'm also disappointed in R's expectation that his "help" should actually be a paying gig for him. Watch out. My sister got a log of "help" when she was moving years ago and some valuable collectibles were stolen.

  11. Dido Says:

    You're making huge strides. Sorry it is such a hassle and everyone seems to have their hand out.

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