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Back from Jersey

August 13th, 2012 at 01:48 am

I got back from visiting my dad in Jersey early this afternoon. I really felt zonked from the drive, as I'd driven the 3 hours straight through without stopping.

While my dad still has vision problems, they don't seem as bad as my dad's ex-significant other said. She tends to exaggerate and get a bit histrionic. He also didn't seem depressed at all, although I know he likes to vist with his children, so maybe I wasn't seeing my dad on a typical day.

Thank you to Analise for the links to the eldercare resources; I'm going to call and see if there's anything they can do vis a vis transportation/driving.

I was able to watch my dad driving as I followed along behind him on the way to breakfast this a.m. as I was headed home after that. He did fine. He has already voluntarily decided not to drive at night, as he has trouble with the glare of lights, so for that I am thankful.

We had a good visit. We talked alot and hit Home Depot so he could help me find some cement caulk. We had 3 meals out. Lunch on Saturday was just me and him at a seafood place on the Tom's River; I had some very good salmon. Dinner that night with K. joining us was a steak and garlic mashed potatoes at Charlie Brown's. And breakfast, with K. again as well as male friend of my dad's who often joins him for breakfast, was a hash and cream cheese omelet. We had breakfast at a place where all the waiters and waitresses wear pajamas. The place is called Shut Up and Eat. It's pretty unique.

So my dad says he has broken up with K. over an argument they had a few weeks ago, but he invited K. to join us for two of the meals out because he knows she and I like each other.

She is upset about the break-up. Her problem is that she keeps trying to get my dad to do what she wants him to do (spend time with her, stay together as a couple, etc) and it backfires becus she keeps trying to MAKE him do it by cajoling him, talking about it and basically pursuing him. It's just aggravating to my father. If she would just back off and leave him alone for a while he might begin to miss her and approach her of his own accord, but she's nearly incapable of doing that.

Ahh. I used to think that by the time you got older, you'd have relationships all figured out. Not true at all.

My dad is a very independent person and at 79 he's still darn cute; he's now sporting a full white beard and looks like a cross between Santa Claus and Ernest Hemingway. K. is just way too pushy and when things are said and my dad starts getting antagonized, she won't stop going at it.

The Friday before i left was very busy here at home. I was trying to print out several large (80 to 100 pages) brochures that I wanted to take with me to Jersey to read and prep for writing the brochure assignment I got. Yes, i could read them online but i like to underline and jot notes as I go. Not only were they humongus files, but when i tried to print them out, they came out in grayscale and very small font. The only solution I could see was cut and pasting everything into a word document where i could change the ink color to black.

Of course, my printer jams up when more than a page is inserted, so i had to print everything out while hand feeding the printer. It took forever.

Then I got a press release out for real etate client and thought I had cleared my plate for next week to focus soley on the PR agency assignment. But then my real estate contact said she was going on vacation for 2 weeks but before she left she wanted to leave me another assignment, writing a brochure for land that is for sale (250 acres of farmland in Massachusetts).

It was a bit of a different project and looked interesting, but she wanted it done fairly soon. Not one to pass on any work if it can be avoided and concerned I'd become too immersed in the PR project next week, I decided at 8:30 pm to just bang the thing out that night, which I did. So I turned that in as well. I hope my clients appreciate it!

I was supposed to let the power washing guy know when i was home tonight so we could start on the next part of HIS project, but i'm afraid i have blown that off. I just feel i need and deserve a break. I'm glad I went to see my dad but I am kind of wiped out.

It'll be back to the grind tomorrow driving J. and then settling in to write a positioning statement for the state agency.

All weekend I was feeling very stymied and blocked and grappling with how to synthesize a huge amount of info about this state agency I'm writing a brochure for, knowing I need to do it quickly. I had been referring to the conference call meeting notes of the account manager and just feeling understanding was not coming easily to me. Then i thought i should revisit my own notes from the conference call and as i read them, everything started making sense to me.

What did this teach me? That I should trust my own instincts! The other person's notes did not emphasize what I had emphasized in my own notes, even though we were on the same call. I need to write this thing the way I think best and not worry about making it conform to someone else's interpretation.

So I wrote a killer intro this a.m. as my dad still slept and hopefully the rest of the brochure will come more easily as well.

I always drive down to Jersey with just a half tank of gas so I can fill up with the much more cheap gas when I'm down there. My dad was with me when I filled up, and he very kindly (and unexpectedly) paid for it. So my trip down there cost me nothing except the $15 in tolls. Yes, that's a lot of tolls on the Garden State Parkway, plus $5 at the Tappan Zee Bridge. Geez.

I have a ton of ripe tomatoes ready for boiling down and freezing. And string beans.

5 Responses to “Back from Jersey”

  1. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    That was very nice of your dad to pay for your gas. Relationships are hard at any age I think ... I wonder if K even realizes what she is doing to drive your dad away? Do you think she'd listen to you if you tried to gently hint at what you saw?

  2. Dido Says:

    Glad that you had a good visit and got one brochure done before going and part of another done while there. I'd sure say you deserved a break and last night off!

  3. patientsaver Says:

    Believe me, Frugal Texan, I told her! Not hinting around,I just told her!

  4. creditcardfree Says:

    It's nice to see you have plenty of work to keep you busy! Good luck getting the PR work completed.

  5. North Georgia Gal Says:

    Welcome Home! Glad to see that you have plenty of work!

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