. These last few days i've really nosedived in terms of my mental outlook. It was a combination of my employment situation, exacerbated by the water damage caused by ice dams. I've been up on that ladder daily trying to chip away that ice, but it's hard, because the ladder's not tall enough and so i'm attempting to chip with a hatchett with my arm fully extended over my head. I can't even look directly at what i'm doing or i'll get ice chips flying in my eyes.
On top of that, still having trouble getting my health coverage thru COBRA "active" because they haven't processed the paperwork yet (even tho i informed the company twice in mid and late December that i would definitely be wanting COBRA come Jan. 1). I already had to reschedule a doctor's appointment so as to give the COBRA administrator and health insurance company time to process what they need to process; i called today and still not active. The doc appt is on Friday. I can't put it off much longer becus i need to renew a medication i'm on for the MS and doc won't renew it for another year unless i see him.
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE JUST GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My friend Michael called and managed to assure me the situation with the ice dam is not that bad and probably won't require knocking out walls, etc. and he doubts mold will be an issue. Not that he's an expert, but it made me feel better not to hear the doom and gloom I read about when researching all this online.
I also touched base with an acquaintance in town, a guy who's very "handy," whom i would trust to replace some sheetrock and do some repairs without ripping me off.
And there's a guy i haven't meet yet (a potential dating partner) who said he knows a guy in the mold remediation business, so i suppose if i wanted to get some testing done, i could turn to that guy as well.
All in all, i feel a little buoyed by all these people around me who each can lend a helping hand. I tend to worry a lot in general, and when you're sort of isolated, staying home due to bad weather and not wanting to spend any money, whatever thoughts and feelings you have tend to get more extreme.
So I feel a little better. My body is aching sore from using that hatchet for the last 4 days and snow shoveling each and every day for the past 2 weeks. It's just incredible. Today i was shoveling to clear the area next to the foundation of the house. Water dripping from the ice dams was freezing and was backed up against the house siding about 2.5 feet high. I was afraid that when that melted, the water would again find ways inside the house, so i had to break it all up with the hatchet and then shovel it away. Not done yet, but definitely made progress. On top of that was all the snow the guys who shoveled my roof off sent crashing down on all sides of the house.
The entryway to my driveway from the road was also getting narrower and narrower. My car just barely fit through the opening and actually scratched the sides of packed ice and snow now well over my head. It was just exhausting work to keep it open. Last night, some plow driver took pity on me and pushed the entire wall of snow and ice on one side of the driveway away. Perhaps it was one of the many people who drove by any number of times and saw a small woman shoveling, shoveling, shoveling.
We're getting another foot tonight. I can't take much more snow.
Feeling glum, but friends lifted my spirits
January 26th, 2011 at 09:55 pm
January 26th, 2011 at 10:02 pm 1296079334
January 26th, 2011 at 10:12 pm 1296079940
Every little bit of movement towards positive thoughts is progress! Things always work out in the end.
January 26th, 2011 at 10:50 pm 1296082243
January 26th, 2011 at 10:58 pm 1296082720
You've been through a lot lately, so it's understandable that you've a had a few glum spells. Glad to see that you are reaching out and getting support.
Do take care up there on a ladder balancing yourself amidst the snow and ice and trying to wield a heavy hatchet over your head. That sounds very treacherous.
Invite that new guy over for dinner, and let him help you! (smile)
January 27th, 2011 at 12:02 am 1296086571
January 27th, 2011 at 12:18 am 1296087488
January 27th, 2011 at 12:36 am 1296088568
Hang in there, SMSL. I'm glad you have supportive friends around you. My sister lives outside of Boston and she is so DONE with the snow. I feel for you...
January 27th, 2011 at 05:37 am 1296106648
January 27th, 2011 at 08:04 pm 1296158645