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Do I have the "write stuff"?

October 30th, 2010 at 01:55 pm

So, I've been at the new job for about 5 weeks now. Aside from the guy who's been giving me assignments (he's not my boss), I still haven't really gotten any feedback about my work from anyone in the company. I think becus everyone's so darn busy, and no one person has really taken ownership of me.

Instead, the positive feedback's been filtering back, not to me, but to the agency that found me. Nice, but I'd still like to hear it directly from the people who count.

So the agency guy told me I need to apply for my job (on a perm basis) on the company's website. He noted that the other writer hired when I was, already did so. (Funny, she didn't mention that to me.)

The agency guy said, I don't want to make you feel you're competing against so-and-so (the other new temporary writer). But of course, that's exactly the situation. He more or less confirmed there was just one job opening, exactly what I suspected...that they hired 3 temp writers and never planned to hire more than one of us.

The agency guy reiterated that they're very pleased with me, I've exceeded their expectations and that as far as competing for the perm job, "I'm ahead of the curve." He rattled off 5 or 6 things about me, he said, that were a good fit for them, the right work ethic, the right personality, the right this and that. He even thanked me for reflecting so positively on the agency. I still feel anxious. So much is riding on this job.(As for my "personality" at the office, I would have to describe it as "scared little rabbit."

If I get this job, I can pay off my mortgage in 3 more years, not 6, and it won't be much of a hardship. I don't have to freak about health insurance costs, which would exceed $500/month if I have to go back on COBRA, sans subsidy. I can also save a lot for retirement. I can ease up on the scrimping.

So now I know not only is the job being advertised internally, it's being advertised externally as well. To the world, in other words.

Funny, the agency never mentioned that. She just said if they like me, they will hire me on a perm basis. Guess that was the carrot. Shame on me for not questioning her more closely, but there's something about a lack of work for 12 months that makes you skip the hard questions.

Of course, I'm still racked with ambivalence. I tell my friends and family I'm the World's Most Reluctant Employee. Cus I'd really rather not be working at all (or at least full-time).

I guess half the population shares that sentiment, so I'm not alone. So I know, of course, that if I get the offer, I WILL take the job. It's just that I need to whine a little. Thanks for listening.

3 Responses to “Do I have the "write stuff"?”

  1. Ima saver Says:
    1288447062

    I am sure you have the "write stuff" Good luck!

  2. Homebody Says:
    1288454946

    I didn't hear any whining.... I heard process thinking!

  3. baselle Says:
    1288492118

    All the temp agencies I've worked with operate on the mushroom principle: keep them in the dark, feed them manure. Apply and see what you come up with. If you don't get it, that's another decision to be made another day.

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