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I'm speechless, shocked, upset.

April 29th, 2017 at 02:13 pm

My carpenter walked off, leaving me with a half-done job.

I'm just floored and very upset.

Today was Day 3. He was making good progress but had to go to Lowes to get more materials. We talked in great detail about what he had left to do, he calculated what it would cost and I gave him another $200 on top of the $500 I gave him at the start of the job.

He left around noon, and didn't return til 2:30 pm. While he was gone, I saw some oil stains his truck had left on my pavers, which was kind of upsetting. It doesn't look good but I went online and cleaning them seems fairly easy, just using dish detergent you let soak on the stain for 30 minutes, then using a scrub brush and then rinsing with hot water. I have it soaking in Dawn detergent now; hope it will work.

But anyway, he was annoyed having to walk further up the driveway since he couldn't drive all the way up. I explained why and pointed out the pavers. He actually said he thought I had put the stains there and said he "knew" I would try to deduct for what I owe him for the bookshelves becus of the stains. I never said I would do that. I just moved my car so he couldn't drive on the pavers.

But this wasn't the real reason he was upset, and I knew it. When I asked him what happened, he said some other driver hit his truck, but while they had damage to their vehicle, they only hit his tire and we looked at it and apparently there wasn't damage. But then he said he almost got arrested because HE LEFT THE SCENE OF AN ACCIDENT, but that the cop was "nice" and didn't make a big deal of it.

So he is VISIBLY upset, and I could understand that. I tried to calm him down and pointed out his truck suffered no damage and he wasn't arrested.

But then he starts talking about things I did that he didn't like. He said the day before I had turned out the dining room chandelier light, and that annoyed him. I turned it off when he left thee job for a while. It had been a cloudy day, but then the sun came out and since the chandelier is pretty dim anyway, I didn't think he'd need it on.

And then he went on and on about the pavers, that he knew where this was going, etc. He just went off on a rant.

I tried talking to him and explaining why i turned the light off and that i hadn't said anything about making him pay for the pavers, but when he remained agitated, I just went inside the house and thought maybe it was best he calm down by himself.

He's coming and going out of my dining room (i went upstairs) so after a while i look out the window and i see him packing up his stuff!

He was walking off the job! I tried to go out and talk to him again, asking him if he could just stop for a minute but he refused and the whole time I'm trying to reason with him he's walking back and forth collecting all his tools and equipment.

He said so many things that were completely irrational, that it just wasn't his day, etc.

I just can't believe this and now I'm wondering who the heck I'll have to find to finish this job. If he showed any interest in finishing it with maybe a small apology, I would gladly let him finish, but he was just so off the deep end I doubt he'll do that.

I'v known this guy for nearly 20 years and hired him off and on over the years and never had this happen. He has had some run-ins with the law and I do remember my girlfriend, the one who first gave me his info as a good handyman/carpenter, telling me a story about him getting arrested after he showed up at the police station with a rifle in the truck.

I think he has some anger management issues, clearly. He had several chances to just calm down but he just made things worse instead. I know he was upset about the car accident and the cop, but he could have recovered from that. You don't go yelling at your customer when clearly I had nothing to do with that, and if the pavers and my turning off the light really bothered him, there were better ways of dealing with it.

I'm holding out small hope that he might call in the next day or two to smooth things over, but I am a little doubtful that will happen. This really stinks.

9 Responses to “I'm speechless, shocked, upset.”

  1. Bluebird Says:

    Oh boy, I would absolutely find someone else to finish the job, whatever the cost may be. I would never place myself in a questionable position with someone acting irrational in my home, ever.

  2. Laura S. Says:

    I agree, I would be afraid to have him back if he is that irrational. I have a friend who is a single female who has a handyman she trusts. She is in your general area in CT. If you decide you want me to get info from her, please let me know.

  3. Wink Says:

    Wow PS I'm sorry you had to deal with that. I agree that I wouldn't feel comfortable having him back in the house. This went way beyond him just having a bad day. I would rather be inconvenienced with having to find a new contractor then putting my safety in jeopardy.

  4. Dido Says:

    I'm sorry you've had such an upsetting time with this 🙁. I wouldn't be afraid if he called to smoothie things over (or I'd be afraid that a rejection at that point would lead to further upset), but you don't think that likely in any case.

  5. AnotherReader Says:

    "I do remember my girlfriend, the one who first gave me his info as a good handyman/carpenter, telling me a story about him getting arrested after he showed up at the police station with a rifle in the truck."

    In your shoes, I would never have hired this person. He clearly has mental problems and I would afraid of him becoming violent. Write this off and hope he does not come back ranting about some perceived list of wrongs.

  6. creditcardfree Says:

    I'm so sorry! The reason he likely didn't calm down is because he has anger management issues. Someone like that often stews over what they are upset about and they have a really hard time letting it go. It is good he left for the day as I wouldn't have wanted him around in that condition much longer. Since you have known him for 20 years, I may actually chalk it up as a bad day, too. If he asks to come back, then I'd let him, but on the condition he communicate anything that bothers him so it can be addressed calmly and if he has another ' bad' day then he is fired.

    He clearly wasn't thinking rationally. One doesn't give up work for his irrational reasons, if they are in their right state of mind.

  7. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    Wow. Doesn't sound good at all.

  8. snafu Says:

    In past history, have you ever wondered if he was on drugs? steroids? or similar? Was he charged for anything realted to the accident?

  9. PatientSaver Says:

    I have no evidence that he's ever been on drugs, legal or otherwise. I didn't have time to find out if he was charged with anything related to the accident but since he said he wasn't arrested, I assume not.

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