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Another facility transfer

October 27th, 2015 at 09:14 am

The Masonicare people told me yesterday my mom had to go back to the skilled nursing unit (aka, nursing home) because they don't feel then can safely handle her needs, even with 3 "assists" (aides).

That was late yesterday afternoon.

This morning I had a phone meeting with a bunch of them and they are recommending my mother be transferred today to their geriatric medical psychiatric program about an hour's drive from me. They want to do a complete "medical holiday" to try to see what's going on.

I had thought the main reason they wanted to move her out of assisted living was because of her nightitme sleeplessness and agitation. Today they told me it's mainly because she cannot stand or walk without the assistance of 3 people, and to remain in assisted living, you have to be an "assist of one," meaning it requires only one person to help you get around.

The head of nursing had told me earlier she wasn't a fan of Depakote and had seen patients entirely lose their ability to walk. I had protested use of this drug myself several weeks ago but the geriatric psychiatrist talked me into letting them try it. But then they increased the dosage at least two times.

Medicare will cover the cost of my mother's stay at the new facility and she would stay there a week or 2 weeks max, they said. I will keep the assisted living room for at least a week or so to give them a chance to assess what's going on. There's a chance she'll recover enough to return to assisted living. But if not, she'll have to go back to the skilled nursing home, this time on the dementia floor (2nd floor), which is very depressing. (It's in the same wing as the short-term rehab unit, which is where my mother had lived for 4 weeks recovering from her hip surgery up until last Friday when they moved her into assisted living. But she was on the 3rd floor, which is not all dementia patients.)

Because I'm working and used up nearly all my vacation time this year, i probably won't be able to see my mother til Saturday at this new facility, unless I go at night. I'm not very familiar with the area, so I don't know.

I think Masonicare is doing the best they can and it seems like a fairly coordinated approach. It does relieve me that they will stop all meds for now. I'm worried about her but trying not to.

11 Responses to “Another facility transfer”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    I think you need a ((HUG)). You are doing everything just right and it does sound as though they are doing right by your mother, too. Really disappointing about that drug, but it is now in the past.

  2. Butterscotch Says:

    Best of luck that they can reformulate her medications to help her improve.

  3. Petunia 100 Says:

    Is your sister visiting your mother at all? I know she has let you carry the burden of all these decisions alone.

    I think you need a {{hug}} too.

  4. PatientSaver Says:

    No, my sister has not visited or seen my mother since March, which was when the 3 of us went out to lunch to celebrate their birthdays. This was the last time my sister behaved badly and shouted at my mother in the restaurant. I am not talking to her and she hasn't called. I honestly have no desire to have a relationship with her.

    I imagine she has a rough idea what's going on becus i regularly update my dad on what's going on with my mom (they're divorced) and my dad is now living in an apt over my sister's barn. So he may be telling her.

  5. Livingalmostlarge Says:

    Best of luck. What is the situation with finding a closer skilled nursing unit? Is there anywhere else more convenient for you? Good luck.

  6. PatientSaver Says:

    She will only be at the geriatric psychiatric place for a week or two. It functions like a hospital. When she returns, she'll either be back in assisted living or the nursing home, both of which are in my hometown.

  7. laura Says:


    Wishing the best possible outcome for your mom after this stay. Wishing you peace and comfort. I can only imagine how difficult this is.

  8. CB in the City Says:

    Hoping that a medical holiday will be just what your mother needs. Hoping for peace and rest for you, too.

  9. Laura S. Says:

    I don't have much to say other than I am thinking of you. I know this is taking a huge toll on you.

  10. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    {{{Hugs}}}

  11. starfishy Says:

    also sending you hugs and wishing you well during this difficult time.

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